One Blackmail Ring To Rule Them
All
By Bek D Corbin
A Jordan Winters Adventure
Edited by Steve Zink
"Mooommm!
Dan's playing with fire!"
Trey was
exercising his God-given right as my little brother to rat me out - again. His
yowl startled me enough that the little ball of Ignis Fatae floating
between my hands flickered and began to fail. I refocused, and nurtured the
blade of witchfire back into full blaze. This particular exercise in Wizardry
was supposed to be easy as pie, once you had the knack of it. But, until you
did get the knack, it was a tiring pain in the ass. I was trying to keep the
little will-o'the-wisp alive as long as I could. My best time so far was about
three minutes. I desperately wanted to check my timer, but the little burglar
alarm had rattled me enough that I wanted it more stable before I shifted my
attention.
So, I
refocused all my attention on the ball of fool's fire, and just had it settled
when Mom stuck her head in the door. "Jordan! Are you- oh!"
She saw the ball of fire between my hands.
A bit
peevish with the repeated interruptions, I asked her, "Will you look at
the timer on the night stand? How many minutes has it been?"
She
walked over and looked. "Six minutes, seventeen seconds."
"Kewl!
I beat the five minute mark!"
"Oh,
then you're finished with this?" She poked a finger into the
center of the ball of witchfire and pulled it out from between my hands. The
lambent blue flame flickered from her fingertip as if the finger were a candle.
"Mooommm!
I was working with that!"
"Nonsense.
If you've beaten the five minute mark, then that's all you can really do
with this today." She turned on her heels and started to leave the room,
the flame burning from her fingertip. "But it will be perfect for
something that I am working on." Nobody takes me seriously.
I
trotted along after her. In the hall, little brother Trey was waiting, his
face aglow with vicious anticipation. "So, what are you gonna do
to Dan, hunh, hunh?" The little rodent.
Mom
smiled down benignly at him. "I'm not going to do anything to him,
dear. He didn't do anything wrong. He wasn't playing with fire. This
is Ignis Fatae, or witchfire or fool's fire, depending on who you ask. It's
the very distilled essence of Glamour. Creating a ball of Ignis Fatae
is a standard exercise in Wizardry. It's very bright, but it isn't hot - it
can't burn you, or catch anything on fire, so it's perfectly safe to work with
in the house. But, it can hurt you very badly, just because your
mind expects it to." She shot me a sharp glance. "So, I
don't want you throwing balls of fool's fire at your little brother, do you understand?"
I nodded.
Seeing the expression of disappointment on Trey's face as I skipped without so
much as a scolding was payback enough for me. As we walked down the stairs, I
asked her, "So, what are you going to use the Ignis Fatae for, Mom?"
"Well,
I'm going to another funding meeting tonight, and I thought that it would be
best to be completely prepared." We went down to Mom's workshop in the
cellar. Dad's workshop is in the gardening shed, next to the still. She
picked up a phial of a clear blue liquid and crammed the ball of witchfire into
the liquid. The liquid roiled for a second, and turned amber. "Ah, good!
I thought that I'd go wearing a 'perfume' that influences people who smell it
to be reasonable."
"Ah,
Mom, isn't that the perfume that you wore to the last three funding
meetings?"
"Yes.
And?"
"Aren't
those the meetings that ended in three-way deadlocks? Didn't you say that the
last one almost ended with Mr. Enderby and Miz Sorensen going for each other's
throats?"
"Yes,
yes, I know. But I'm sure that this variant will..." she went off
into a technical explanation that would have put Mister Spock into a coma.
I interrupted
her. "Mom? Just a thought. The purpose of that scent is supposed to
urge people to be reasonable, right? But, Mom, are you absolutely sure
that your positions are reasonable? I mean, you always say that
politics is less about who's right than it is about who wins. So,
if you go in wearing a perfume that makes people be reasonable, but you
act unreasonably, doesn't that create a kind of conflict of interests?
Wouldn't the paradox kind of reflect into everyone around you, creating a
really irritating situation in which everyone is absolutely certain that they
are being absolutely reasonable, while everyone else is completely unreasonable?
Wouldn't that really piss them off? And remember, Mom, according to the
Parameters of Grace, the Rule of Intent states that your real motivation will
always influence the working, altering it to fit your true intention."
Mom
looked at me poleaxed. "But...I have to get this funding..."
"So,
be reasonable about it. Or leave the perfume at home."
Mom
looked at me exasperatedly as I left the cellar. I was well out of the cellar
before I did my little victory dance. YES! Scoring on your parents is the best!
*****
The real
problem with out-smarting yourself is that at the time, it looks like you're
outsmarting someone else. During my legally mandated incarceration at Horace
Mann Elementary and Middle Schools, I've been using the Fool's Cap as a kind of
'danger sense' to avoid incoming assholes, and after school, I switch over to
female mode. And, since the wearer of the Fool's Cap is known to one and all
as 'Dan', not Jordan, they can look for me all they want and not find me. To
and from, I use my bike, thus avoiding that perambulating chamber of horrors we
call a school bus. So far, so brilliant. BUT, in my haste to avoid the slings
and arrows of the other kids, I forgot what the Fool's Cap does, besides give
me grief. It provides the other kids with someone to vent on. Since I've been
avoiding them, they haven't been blowing off any of that steam - or at least,
not as much as they'd like.
I was
walking to the bike rack at the end of the school day. I had a new outfit
hidden in my backpack, and I was looking forward to spending the afternoon with
Griff and his friends. As per usual, I'd waited in the library for the
schoolbus to pull out. Hey, if it worked for Hannah Romney, back in the 1920's,
who am I to quibble? Then I got to the bike rack. Some asswipe bastard
had put one of those Kryptonite motorcycle locks on my bike! I gave it a few
experimental tugs, gave a disgusted sigh and turned to go to the office. So
much for an afternoon with Griff.
But the
front door to the school was locked. So, I walked around the side. Then I
realized that this was more than just an expensive prank - it was strategy. Cole
Pesloe and his goon-squad, Reed Wallace and Arnie Gannon, were waiting there,
well out of sight of official eyes.
"Hey,
Wuss-Boy, wassa matta, you lose the rock you been hidin' under?" After
that, it was pretty much Standard Harassment Technique #5, so I'll spare you
the play-by-play. You've been there, just fill in the details, if you have to.
At least, it started out as Standard Harassment Technique #5, but it
went toxic real fast. Like I said before, they were in withdrawal from lack of
aggression venting. It wound up with me on the ground being kicked in the ribs
and spat upon. I don't know which was worse, getting beat up, having a whole
bunch of the other kids watch, or listening to them cheer.
It was
eventually broken up when someone yelled out that a teacher was coming. The
Math teacher, Mr. Hawes, helped me to the Nurse's office. The nurse made sure
that I didn't have any broken bones or internal injuries, and sent me to the
Vice-Principal's office. Then it got worse.
Ms. Sorensen,
the Vice-Principal, told me in rather frigid terms that she had 'information'
that I had started the fight.
"FIGHT?
You call that a fight? I got jumped! Three guys beat the crap
outta me, and you're calling it a fu- freaking fight?"
"MISTER
Winters, just because you mother is on the School Board, that
does not mean that you are immune to the rules that apply to the
rest of us! I have been told by someone who was there, that you waited
for the other boys, and repeatedly insulted them."
"I
waited for them? I've been riding my bike to and from school, just to avoid
them on the bus! The only reason that I'm still here, is that they slapped a motorcycle
lock on my bike!"
"Oh?"
She got up and looked out the window at the bike rack. "There isn't one
there now."
"They
took it off once they jumped me! Those things are expensive,
y'know!"
"So
you say. But I have no reason to believe you."
"Are
you calling me a liar?"
"I'm
saying that you have two weeks detention for fighting. Beginning Now."
She led
me off to the detention room, where Cole, his buddies and everybody else that
I'd been avoiding were waiting for me. Y'know, the times I'd done detention
before, the fact that the teacher on duty, Mr. Selbie, would leave the room for
ten minutes at a stretch didn't bother me that much.
Hell,
the only good thing that happened was that as I was avoiding looking at Cole
smirking at me, I looked out the window. And saw Reece Aubrey riding his bike
home - with a Kryptonite motorcycle lock poking out of his backpack.
*****
Looking
back, it made a lot of sense that it would be Reese. God knows that Cole and
his buddies weren't sharp enough to come up with that motorcycle lock scam. And,
Reece was an Aubrey, naturally, and the Aubreys and the Walthers (my mother's
family) have never gotten along. No shootings or even curses, thank Bog, but a
general case of bad blood that goes back to who-knows-when. Also, Reese has
what Paris Ashbroom would call 'a rather .... unfortunate sense of
humor'. Screw that, he's just a wiseass.
*****
When I
got home, the hits just kept on coming. Mom let out a yell like a treed
wildcat when she saw the condition of my face. Trey gleefully told Mom that I
had a 'month of detention' for fighting. Upon hearing that I'd been beaten,
humiliated, tried and sentenced without due process, and accused of being a
liar, Mom sent me to my room without dinner.
I was in
my room, meditating on the relative advantages of running away to become a
hermit in the back hills, when I heard a knock at my door. Mom poked her head
in the door. "Are you accepting visitors, or aren't you through sulking?"
"Come
back in five minutes - I'm halfway through a really good sulk, and I
don't wanna spoil it."
"Time
flies. First of all, I want to apologize-" This really got my attention;
Mom apologizing is one of those things that only happen once in the proverbial
blue moon, and not always then. "Ms. Sorensen called and told me her
version of why you got so much detention. From the way that she was trying to
make it sound like I was raising John Wayne Gacy, I can't imagine that she gave
you anything like a fair hearing. Then she tried to use the threat of
expelling you from school as leverage in our negotiations."
I really
perked up at that - if Mom pulled me out of Horace Mann in order to avoid an
expulsion on my record, she might decide to send me to an out-of-town boarding
school, which would mean that I could get out from under the Fool's Cap. Which,
if there were any justice in the world, would land squarely on Reese Aubrey's
head.
But Mom
wasn't having any of that. "But when she threatened to throw you out of
school, I pointed out that I could dispute this before the School Board. And,
what with five guys-"
"It
was only three guys, and at least a dozen witnesses."
"Okay,
three guys whaling the tar out of you, and going scot free; it wouldn't
take Perry Mason to turn it into an example of political harassment. I can't
get you out of detention - that would look too much like preferential treatment.
But the detention will only last until Friday - after all, it was
only a fight, and one where you got the worst of it."
I
still wasn't happy. "That bi- Bat called me a liar."
"I
can't do anything about that. And kids spinning tales is part and
parcel of her job." She kissed me on the forehead, and told me that this
too shall pass.
After
she left, I locked the door and got out my hairbrush. I weaved the Glamour
into my cute female self. But, looking at my female self wasn't as soothing as
it might have been. It only reminded me that I wouldn't be able to hang out
with Griff and his buddies. And that's practically the only thing keeping me
sane with all the hazing I'm getting these days.
*****
I
slogged through the week in detention. If I had built up a karmic debt with
all that jiggery-pokery at Paris Ashbroom's party, I was back in the black by
Friday. Saturday morning, I was out of the house the second my 'toons were
over and on my bike into town. I just hoped that I'd be able to explain my
absence to Griff without playing too fast and loose with the facts.
I
changed in the second story restroom of the public library, 'cause it was the
best way to lose anyone who might be following me. Then I checked out the
comic book store, 'cause it was the day that they brought out the new comics. Griff,
Stew, Lex and JayDee were there. I eased into the store, while they were
intensely discussing the latest issue of AEGIS. I went around
and picked up the new issues of Lady Lightning, Tigress,
and Power Woman. They finally noticed me as I went to the
counter to pay for the comics.
"Hey,
Jordan! Whereya been?"
"Ah,
I got detention all week last week. An' after that, I hadda get home
straight away - you know how it is."
"What
did you do?"
"Nuthin'!
I got set up!"
After
that, they phased me into the discussion of the latest developments in AEGIS,
and I managed to steer the discussion out of the store. I even managed to
further steer them into the Soda Fountainbleu, and got Griff to treat me to one
of those frilly parfait thingies as we talked. What can I say, the damn things
taste better when someone else pays for them!
After
the trip to the Soda Fountainbleu, we walked around Old Town for a while, and
ran into Paris and Della. Paris paired off with Lex, and Della hooked up with
Stew, and there was poor JayDee, odd man out again. Once again, I wondered if
there was something I could do for him, without blowing things all out of
proportion. Still, he seemed cool with it.
Della
insisted that we go into the local record store and see what was new. Paris,
Della and I were off by ourselves, comparing the Backstreet Boys to N'Sync,
deciding which had the cuter members. Or at least, they did - in male or
female mode, I think those guys are totally lame. Then someone grabbed the
back of my top and I felt something wriggly and prickly fall down my back. Naturally,
I freaked, and jumped up and down to get it out. After doing a shimmy for a
few minutes, a plastic spider fell out. I heard laughing, and spun around to
see who'd done this to me. There was Reece Aubrey, guffawing away. "You!"
I hissed, "You- Creep!" I stopped his laughing with a sharp
slap on his face.
Griff
all but teleported to my side. "Jordan, are you all right?"
"This
asshole put a spider down my back!"
Griff
glared at Reece, who waved him off. "Hey, it was only a plastic
spider! It was a joke! I didn't know she had a boyfriend."
Trust
Reece to turn the situation around so that I was on the spot. I just blushed a
little, and said nothing; Griff took me by the arm and led me out of the store
with a last harsh glare at Reece.
Reece
was giving me this weird look. This did not bode well at all.
*****
Monday,
I biked to school again, and this time, I took a tube of metal epoxy with me. If
Reece was going to try the motorcycle lock trick again, I'd just squirt some
epoxy in the lock and it would cost him the price of that lock. I also took
the seat and front wheel off, just in case he was smart enough to play
variations on a theme.
Jeez,
all that preparation, and Reece didn't pull anything. Not unless he was the
guy who put the padlock on my locker. Nope, couldn'ta been - it was still
there when the janitor came with the bolt cutters. Reece woulda taken it off,
just to annoy me.
At the
end of the school day, my bike was still there, more or less untouched. I
guessed that Reece decided that focusing on my bike was too predictable.
But Cole
and his goon squad weren't giving up on me. They tried to follow me on their
bikes, but I lost them with a little hocus-pocus. I did my switch in the
public library again, and went looking for my new gang. Instead, I ran into
Paris and Della. We indulged in a little female bonding, by drooling at
dresses in shop windows that we were too young for, and couldn't afford, even
if we were. After a bit, we ran into Griff and Stew, and we hung out with them
for a bit. We did a whole lot of nuthin' for a while, and finally time for me
to split, Griff walked me to the trolley. We waited for it for a few minutes;
as the trolley turned the corner, Griff took my face in his hands and kissed me.
It wasn't quite as high voltage as that first kiss, but nothing ever quite
measures up to a first kiss, now does it? Even so, the trolley still had to
ring us out of our clinch. I got on, and rode to the library with a silly grin
on my face.
When I
got to the library, I saw to my horror, that that asshole Reece Aubrey had
motorcycle locked my bike to the rack! Why won't that scumbag leave me alone?
I shook at the lock experimentally, and was surprised by a flash.
I
whipped around. Behind me was Reece, holding a pocket camera and wearing a
shit-eating grin on his face (I've always considered that a disgusting
expression, but on Reece, it fit!). "Well, well - Look at you!
Don't you look pretty?" Somehow, he managed to make 'pretty' sound
vile. He swaggered up to me. He walked around me. "That's a nice
outfit, Winters - not as nice as the one you were wearing at the record store,
but nice."
I
gave him a disgusted look. "Oh. It's you. Spider-boy."
He
waggled his eyebrows at me. "Oh, gonna play it cool, hunh? Gonna
make out like you don't know what I'm talkin' about, and yer gonna
scream for the cops any second now, right? Okay. I can respect that. That
takes brass, Winters; more brass that I thought you had in you." He
looked me up and down. "But then, there's so much more to you than
anyone thought."
My heart
was thumping away at a thousand miles a second in my chest. My worst nightmare
was coming true - I'd been found out, and by the absolute worst person
possible. But I tried to put a bold face on it. "Oh, lovely.
More jokes. What, run out of fake blood and plastic vomit?"
He
leaned into my face. "You can try and bluff all you want, Dan - oh
that's right, your name isn't Daniel, it's Jordan, isn't it.
Well, Jordan, my family has been in The Craft for as long as
yours has; I know a Glamour when I see one. Though, I'll give you credit - this
is a first rate job, Winters. I didn't catch the Glamour when I first
saw you in the record store. But you blew it, girlie-boy; you recognized me,
and I knew that I'd never met the cute chick you look like. So I
checked you out. Mind you, I didn't realize that the nerd I was following and
the mystery lady I was keeping an eye out for were one and the same. Not until
Dan the Dork went into the public library and Little Miss X comes out five
minutes later."
I
gave him a pitying look. "You do realize how insane you sound, don't
you?"
He
wasn't fazed in the least. "So, Play it that way, Winters. I know
that you went into the library, 'cause I was following the Fool's Cap; and
y'know somethin', Winters? While it may be weaker when you're
like this, it's still there! Your fag buddies may not know it,
but you're still fair game. For anything. And once these
pictures of you walking around in girl's clothing - and kissing a guy - hit the
streets, you'll be lucky to survive long enough to explain this whole ugly mess
to yer mom! And we both know that Glamours don't show up
on film!"
Obviously,
he didn't know about what happened at Paris Ashbroom's party, and I wasn't
about to fill him in on it. His evidence would never stick, but he still had
me made. If I told him, he'd just move heaven and earth to find some that
would. Well, he had the rope in his hands, and he was twisting it into a knot.
But I still had to get him up on a chair. But I wasn't worried - he wanted
something, or he wouldn't have let me know. Not when it would have been so
much more fun to catch me flat-footed.
I folded
my arms across my chest and cocked my head. "Okay, Reece, y'got me. So,
what are your terms?"
He ran a
hand through his spiked-up red hair, and smirked while he checked me up and
down. Now I know what girls mean when they say that guys can make them feel
like a piece of meat. "I haven't quite decided. I have an idea,
but I'll need a little time to fine-tune it." In other words, he needed
time to think of something appropriately vile.
He
turned, and I caught his arm. "Before you go, Aubrey, there are three things
that you need to understand. First - there's no way that I can do
whatever it is that you have in mind (and what a tiny vicious
little mind it is!), if this ever comes out. My Mom will probably have me move
in with my Aunt Dell in Philadelphia, if anyone ever sees photos of me as a boy
in a dress. So, no joy for you. I suggest that you don't have those prints
developed."
"Why
not? Nobody's ever gonna see 'em, girlie-boy!"
"Knowing
how cheap you are, Aubrey, you'll probably use Photo-Mat or some other
cheapass developer. The people in the lab will see them, and the people at the
counter always open the envelopes, hoping to spot some amateur porno. Copies
of me would be all over the place by Sunday if you send them there." Reece
scowled, but couldn't argue with my logic. Hah! He didn't realize it, but I'd
just taken control of the situation. I pressed my advantage.
"Second
- if I'm gonna do whatever it is that you have in mind, I'm gonna need a little
freedom of movement. I can't have Cole Pesloe and his Hole-In-The-Head Gang
hanging over my shoulder every minute. So, back off with the gags! I
can't expect you to try to stop the Pesloe swarm, but you can
stop giving them tips and warn me of anything that they're gonna try."
He
sneered at me and said, "If I hear that they're gonna try to decapitate
you, I'll let you know. Third?"
"Third
- get this stupid lock off my bike! I gotta get home for dinner!"
As Reece
fumbled with the key, I reached into my backpack and got the tube of metal
epoxy. When the Kryptonite lock was off my bike, I grabbed it, squirted a glob
of the epoxy in the lock and shut the hasp.
I got on
my bike and sang out, "G'bye, Reese!" as I pedaled off. Reece
was too busy cursing and trying to get the lock unstuck. Well, at least I
don't have to worry about that trick again!
*****
Reese
caught up with me by my locker between classes the next day. "You owe me
for the cost of that motorcycle lock."
"Yeah?
Try and collect."
"Y'know,
you're not very cooperative, for someone who's a photo developing job
away from complete ruin."
"Reese?
It occurs to me that if you let those things get around, you'll be slitting
your own throat as well as mine. After all, there will be all those questions
about how I could pass so completely in person, while being so obvious on film.
The Coven will probably find a way of putting a lid on it, but they will NOT be
happy with the wiseass who broke one of the cardinal rules: Thou Shalt Not
Give Away The Show. I will be in trouble, but you?
Your family will come down on you like Stone Cold Steve Austin, just to show
everyone else that they weren't party to it. And if I get hurt? Your own mother
will tie you to the stake, while my family heaps the kindling high. You might
as well burn those negatives now, while no one else has seen them."
"Y'know,
you're right. I can't let them hit the streets - but I can
pass them along to, oh, say, Miz Sorensen, and let her use them to rip
yer Ma apart."
Give the
weasel his due - he knew how to hit where it hurt. Too bad for him, the gun he
was pointing at Mom's head was empty. But I couldn't let him know that. First
I had to find out what he wanted, and then ram it down his throat. "Well,
enough sparkling banter - what do you want in return for that roll of undeveloped
negatives?"
He gave
a quick look around. "Not here. I don't want to be seen spending too
much time with you. Something might rub off. What say after school, you put
on one of your pretty-pretty outfits, and meet me at the Burger King, at oh,
say, 4:00?"
"And
what makes you think that I want to be seen with you, Aubrey? My
other identity does have a reputation to think of!"
He
sneered. "Yeah, And a Boooyyyfrieeennnd!"
"Jealous?"
"Just
Be There!"
*****
Like it
or not, I was at the Burger King at the appointed hour. I was wearing my
striped jersey and jumper outfit, and not happy about wasting it on a piece of
backwoods hoodoo-trash like Reece Aubrey. Fortunately, the BK wasn't part of
my regular circuit with Griff and the gang, so I didn't have to worry too much
about who saw us there.
Reece
ambled in about 4:30 - typical, he would find a way to stick it to me,
even if it was just ripping off as much of my afternoon as possible. He
smirked at me, and slid down into one of the seats. He gave me a leering
glance and drawled, "Awww, Babe! Did you put on that cute little
number just for me?"
I took
my lips off the milkshake straw and drawled right back at him, "Oh, look.
It's Spider-boy."
He just
gave me a 'very funny' grimace, and went on. "So, Miss Phelps, your
assignment, whether you like it or not, is to infiltrate your mother's office
and deliver into my hands the minutes of this Tuesday's School Board meeting before
it's sent to the Notary."
My eyes
went wide, and I stopped sucking on my milkshake. "What the fuck
do you want with the School Board minutes? I've been to those meetings, and
when they aren't trying to rip out each other's throats, they could bore a
freakin' CPA into a coma!"
He gave
me a Cheshire cat grin and said, "I've got an uncle who's interested in
investing in sports equipment. There are four separate outfits competing for
the contract to provide the school district's uniforms and sports supplies. If
he knows which one is gonna get the contract before it clears the
bookkeepers, he can invest his money with a sure-fire winner while the prices
are low. If I can give him this information, he might sign over the
pink slip to his '84 Jaguar, as soon as I hit 16."
So, a
little insider trading. It was just sleazy enough for Reece to be interested
in, but I had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to it than that. "Okay,
Reece, I'll get you a copy-"
"No,
not the copy. The original. Before it goes to the Notary."
Now I knew
the little sleazebag was up to something. But best to play the wide-eyed
innocent. "Okay, the original. And that's it. You burn the
negatives, and you leave me the hell alone. You can play all the pranks
you want in school, but once school is out, and I'm like this, you stay the
fuck away from me and my friends. No cute little tricks, no 'anonymous'
notes, no sly insinuations, No Nuthin'. Period."
He got
cagey. "We'll exchange formal declarations when you hand over the minutes."
A bit of explanation is called for here. If lying is Bad Karma, then breaking
a formal oath is the karmic equivalent of laying your head on the tracks while
a freight train is coming. Major league bad news.
*****
Once I
got home, I was beat. And I still had homework to do, and dinner to help with.
I slumped down exhausted on the couch. Clyde came over and laid his head on my
lap, looking up at me in that soulful way that dogs have. I scratched his head.
"Sorry, Clyde, but there's no way that I'm tellin' you my troubles.
You'd only tell Dad, and I just don't need that right now."
Clyde
sighed, and shut his eyes. It was good to just be there, with no one busting my
chops about anything.
*****
I was on
the family computer 'doing research' - which was true enough, I just wasn't
doing it for school - when the next little bomb landed. Little brother Trey
walked up to me and started grinning at me. He stood there grinning, until I
couldn't ignore him anymore.
I gave
him a frosty glare and said, "No, I don't wanna play 'Batman' - every
time you play the Joker, you use it as an excuse to break things and blame me."
He
kept grinning. "Oh, would you prefer to play 'Bat-Girl,
maybe?"
In the
next heartbeat, Trey was hanging from his shirt-collar, feet dangling. I
snarled into his face, "And EXACTLY What is That SUPPOSED to
mean?"
I gotta
admit, the little rodent could keep his cool. "You hit me, an' I'll tell
Mom that you been going around spelled up to look like a gurl."
"You
can't prove anything, y'little spore."
"I
know where you keep yer sissy-girl clothes, and if Mom asks you straight out,
you can't lie to her. If I tell, _You_ Are _Screwed_. _Period_."
"And
exactly what do you want for your silence, oh Altitudinally Challenged
Evil Mastermind?"
"Welll...
Let's start with you doing my homework."
"And
that's IT."
"For
_Now_."
Oh, Gog,
even my little brother is jumping on the 'Dump on Dan' bandwagon. I
wonder if Dan Maxham ever has days like this.
*****
It took
a little doing, but I managed to use Dad's codebreaker software to get access
to the local phone company logs. Sure enough, the Aubrey's had three phone
lines, one of which got the special Internet connection special rate. With
that, I broke into the Aubrey's PC and checked out the User History. Lessee
now... CyberPorn, Hollywood gossip, CNN, Stock reports, Online Gaming, Lotto
numbers, Public School Scandals... say what?
I got
the address and looked it up. The site was called State Education
Roundup: Focus on Public School Corruption. This did not look good. The first report was a story from
Alabama, where the title was: School Board Minutes Changed To OK Theft.
So,
Reece was gonna fiddle with the minutes, and either add or subtract something
from them. But why? There's no way that he could get his hands on any
of that money. Maybe that uncle he mentioned actually owned the
sporting goods firm, and he was gonna arrange it so that his uncle would get an
obscene profit. No, it didn't fit. He only said that his uncle might
sign over the pink slip. Anything might happen. But what would Reece
stand to gain from stealing-
Whoa. Wait
a minute. He doesn't actually have to steal anything. He can
make it look like someone else is stealing. Like Mom, or Miz Sorensen,
or Coach Backus. Even if they catch the change after it goes to the Notary,
and change it back, he can make it sound like a cover-up. He could hold it
over ALL our heads for as long as he wanted, and there'd be absolutely no
backlash, like there would for spreading around his theoretical pictures of me.
Yes. This is was exactly what Reece would pull.
Okay,
Reece, you've tied your noose, put the loop around your shoulders, and thrown
the rope over the rafters. Now all I have to do is wait for you to climb up on
the chair.
*****
Wednesday
rolled around, as it tends to, whether you want it to or not. I sidled up next
to Reece at the urinal and muttered, "BK. 4 o'clock. Be there On Time,
this time."
*****
At 4, I
was at the BK, wearing the striped jersey and jumper outfit. Why waste
anything new on Reece? He came in and plopped himself down. "Okay,
Babe, where's the goods?"
I gave
him an 'Oh, Puh-leeze!' look. "Hey, I am not handing
anything over to you until after formal declarations are exchanged. And
personally, I don't think that a fast food joint is the proper place for
that sort of thing. People listen and talk, y'know."
"Right.
How about Kissing Rock in Cooper's Wood, at around 5?"
I barely
nodded assent. And then, just in case he was trying to score points off my reputation,
I bolted upright, and yelled, "You Creep!" Then I
threw what was left of my milkshake in his face, and stormed out the doors.
*****
It was a
little after Five when I got to Kissing Rock. Reece's choice of venue had me
worried, so I'd changed back to my guy-mode. Reece seemed a little put out by
the change. "Hey, why'd you switch?"
I gave
him a 'go fuck yourself' grin, and said, "I wouldn't put it past you to
say to yer buddies that you were going to Kissing Rock to meet a cute blonde to
- *wink, wink! Nudge, nudge!* - 'conduct a little business', or
something like that. Now, if anyone asks you if you met a girl here - for anything
- there's no way that you can say you did without lying. And
we both know what kind of trouble that starts. B'sides, if you
got yer buddies in the woods, peepin', your reputation will take a much
worse beating that mine."
Reece
chewed on that for a bit. Then he got over it and held out his hand. "Okay,
gimme the minutes, hand 'em over."
I shook
a finger at him. "Ah, Ah, Ah! First things first,
Aubrey! First, the Formal Declarations, with the appropriate binding
oaths, Then we exchange goods."
"What
exchange?"
"You
didn't bring the roll of film?"
"Now
WHY would I do a stupid thing like that?"
"I'm
gone." I turned.
"Hey,
Hey, Hey! Where y'goin'?!"
"Hey,
if you aren't going to turn over the film to me, then I'd be pretty stupid
to give you anything, now wouldn't I?"
"And
I'd be pretty stupid to bring the film here, where you could fog it with
witchfire or something, now wouldn't I?"
Actually,
I hadn't thought of that. "So, what now? I ain't handin' these over on
just your say-so, and you ain't risking your Ace-In-the-Hole. So what do we
do?"
"What
if I swear by my own name, my family name, my mother, my heart and my breath
that I will destroy the film the first thing I do when I get home?"
"Only
if right now, you will swear by those oaths that you have not developed
the film, and made no copies of it."
He
sighed, folded his hands over his heart and recited, "I do swear, by my
own name, Reece Ashe Aubrey, and by family's name of Aubrey, and by my Mother,
Mirriam Lilly Cosgrove Aubrey, and by my heart and by my breath, that I have
not developed the film of which we were speaking, nor in any way made any
copies thereof."
Thereof? Reece was getting a big head, here! "Good,
now swear by the Ones that you'll destroy the film first thing, if I give you
this envelope."
"Only
if you swear by The Rivers that what's in that envelope is the exact original
minutes of the Millbridge District School Board meeting of last Tuesday, and
that you've added nothing to, or taken nothing out of those minutes."
Whew! The Rivers is a major league oath! I
nodded, tucked the envelope under my arm, folded my hands and recited, "I,
Jordan Jesse Winters, do swear by the Rivers that flow from the Stars, from the
Skies, from the Winds, from the Earth, from under the Earth, from the Blood,
from my Heart, from my Mind, from my Dreams, and from my very Soul; that flow
into the world, through the world and into the next world; I do swear by these
sacred Rivers that the envelope that I have for Reece Ashe Aubrey contains
nothing but the exact original minutes of the Millbridge District School Board
meeting of last Tuesday, and that I've added nothing to, or taken nothing out
of those minutes."
Reece
nodded, satisfied, and resumed the oath-taking posture: "I, Reece Ashe
Aubrey, do swear, By the One Sun, By the One Sky, By the One Sea, By the One
Land, By the One Tree, and By the One Blood, that I will destroy the film that
I took of Jordan Jesse Winters as soon as I reach my home, and make no copies
of any kind before I destroy it." He looked at me, and I could see all
the plans he was making to screw me over, which that most binding of oaths
would do absolutely nothing to stop him from pulling, brewing behind his eyes.
I
handed him the envelope. "Open it."
"Why?
I trust you."
I
grinned evilly. "Open it." Behind my back, I strained
to form a ball of Ignis Fatae in one hand.
Curious,
Reece opened the manila envelope. Inside was a slightly smaller white envelope.
He pulled it out, and a small slip of paper fell out. He looked at the white
envelope. It had 'Reece Ashe Aubrey' written on it. Then he reached down to
pick up the slip of paper. It had strange runes written on it in an odd brown
ink.
Before
he could get a sense of what the runes were, I threw the ball of witchfire at
the slip. Now, Ignis Fatae doesn't burn things - normally. But there are
certain Alchemical solutions that will ignite if hit by fool's fire. Solutions
like those that I'd soaked the paper in. It went up like a torch, scorching
Reece's fingers.
Reece
yelped, shook his fingers and stuck them in his mouth, then he looked at me,
and said, "What did you do to me?"
"Oh,
I just laid an enchantment on you. It kicked in the second that
you accepted the slip of paper from my hand."
He
glared red hatred at me. "You broke your Word,
Winters! You swore by The Rivers one minute, and broke it the next! No matter
What you did to me, _You _ are _Toast _, Asshole!"
I smiled
serenely. "No, I'm not. Y'see, that white envelope, the one with your
name on it, is the one that I referred to in my oath. Remember, I said,
'the envelope that I have for Reece Ashe Aubrey'? That envelope
contained nothing but the School Board minutes, just like I said.
The slip of paper with the Enchantment Runes on it was in the larger
envelope with the envelope for you, and I didn't say Shit
about that. And when I burned the slip, that stopped any chance you had
of turning the enchantment back at me." [Author's Note: See the classic
Columbia movie The Curse of the Demon (1952) with Dana Andrews,
based on the Montague James story Casting the Runes, for a
demonstration of this principle - not to mention a great old movie!]
I sat
down on the rock and grinned up at Reece. "Reece, how stupid d'you
think I AM? Do you really think I couldn't see all the ways that you could get
around your oath, just the way I did? So, I decided to keep you honest -
in this, anyway - and buy a little insurance."
He
gaped down at me fearfully. "What does the enchantment do?"
"Not
much. Y'see, it's basically a sorcery cord linking us. And, since it
was forged in a matter sealed by such powerfully binding oaths, it's
gonna be a real Grizzly to cut. It's a triggered effect, which uses the cord
that we just formed. IF you EVER do anything that you know or believe
will harm me in any way or be considered an attack, directly or indirectly,
in person or by proxy, that sorcery cord will move the Fool's Cap from my
head to yours. If you screw me over in ANY WAY, You are the
new Designated Victim - for the rest of your life. There won't be any
escaping it by leaving the area or graduating from school. You'll be
everyone's whipping post, until you die. And on your death, the Cap
will move on to your eldest child and so forth, until the Final Sifting of
Things."
Reece
looked like he was gonna hurl.
"Hey,
Reece, buck up! The Cap isn't on your head - YET. All you have
to do is stop screwing with me. That shouldn't be that hard, now
should it?"
I got up
and started to leave. Then I stopped and said over my shoulder, "Leave
the minutes in my locker before the end of school tomorrow. I have to get them
back to my mother's office before they're missed. It won't do you any good if
they turn up missing, now, will it?"
*****
Later
that evening, I finished putting the last touches on Trey's history essay. It
was a pretty good piece of work, for a third grader. I stacked the essay in a
neat pile. The scrap of enchanted paper that I slipped between two of the
sheets was an even better piece of work than the essay. Working on the Rune-Slip
that I'd passed onto Reece had given me the idea. I went upstairs, and knocked
on Trey's door. He opened the door and peered out at me. "Here's your
homework, oh, Lord and Master. And this is the last piece of
work that I'll be doing for you."
"Yeah.
Suuuurrrreee," he said, in a tone that suggested that I'd be doing
his homework in college, if he had his way. He took the sheaf of papers that I
pushed on him. The slip of paper fell out as he looked through the essay, but
not before I felt the enchantment click into place.
Trey
closed the door in my face, shoving the slip into the hallway. I picked up the
slip, and torched it with witchfire. The hex that I'd laid on Reece worked
better because he knew exactly what it was, and how it worked. My luck must
be on an upturn, for Reece to suggest such powerful oaths to bind our deal. But
the enchantment that I'd put on Trey would work better if he didn't know about
it. It would work, because it was basically an addition to an enchantment that
all the members of the local coven put on their children as soon as they can
talk. It basically diverts the child's direction from mentioning that
their parents are witches or can do magic. Any time that they would - intentionally
or unintentionally - let it slip, the hex would distract them with something,
or nudge them into procrastinating, or make them forget what they were going to
say. It is a very old, very elegant, and very effective enchantment. It
doesn't harm the children, mostly because they aren't told about it
until it's lifted when they are brought into The Craft. If they don't know
about it, it won't bother them. I just added the matter of my 'feminine self'
to the list of things that the hex deflects. Now, every time Trey wants to rat
me out - at least in regards my second identity - he'll simply find something else
to do. It will make things much simpler for me.
*****
At
lunch, I found a dead rat in my locker - on top of an envelope. I dumped the
rat in a trashcan, and opened the envelope. While I had no doubt that the rat
was from Reece - after all, it wouldn't harm me - I had no worries that
he might try to counter-hex me. That would fall very neatly
under the trigger conditions. No, Reece's real satisfaction would be
turning the screws on Coach Backus, Miz Sorensen, and on my Mom.
I pulled
out the minutes and checked the back page. Yes, there was a second set of
staple holes. He'd unstapled the report and restapled it. I counted the pages
- there were five extra. This was much better than it would've been if he took
something out. I took my xeroxed copy of the report and compared them. Give
the weasel his due, he was good. He didn't put them all in a single clump - he
inserted each new page in a separate part of the report. I unstapled it again,
removed Reece's little pranks, and re-stapled it.
Later
that day, as I was leaving to go to Mom's office to put the report back, I
spotted Reece with his buddies. Reece saw me, and I saw a smile flicker across
his face. He thought that he was having the last laugh. But the real
last laugh was gonna happen when Reece tried putting the screws to Sorensen. I
was sure that it was Reece that had 'informed' on me to Sorensen. He'd lied to
her when he said that I started that fight. He should have known better. Anything
that a witch does, that starts with lying, is sure to turn out poorly. And
when he tries to get Sorensen under his thumb, she's sure to realize how badly
she's been had.
Reece,
look under your feet - where's the chair?
END
